


Not alone

by lostinprocrastination



Category: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV)
Genre: F/M, Slow Burn, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2019-08-10
Packaged: 2020-08-14 02:14:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20184565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostinprocrastination/pseuds/lostinprocrastination
Summary: Midge comes back from her 6-month European tour opening for Shy Baldwin without many people she can or wants to see. There's *someone*, though, that somehow is always there.





	Not alone

**Author's Note:**

> Very special thanks to gray-jedi-scavenger-rey on Tumblr for beta-ing this for me, but also to all users who kept sending likes to my post talking about this fic from months ago. Depression was hitting hard back when I was working and now everything's been hectic because I'm about to move overseas, but I love this and I promise I'll try to update from time to time and not leave it behind!
> 
> (Oh, I guess I should say, that this story takes place, as will be obvious once you start, after the events of season 2.)

When her Pan Am flight from London landed on Idlewild, Midge was still exhilarated from all she had experienced throughout Europe opening for Shy Baldwin. At the time he'd invited her to join his tour, she believed to be considerably knowledgeable about the showbiz world - but boy, was she wrong. The precise preparations for the big venues, the running around behind the scenes, the backstage gatherings - however tiring everything had been, and believe her, _exhausting_ doesn't even begin to describe it, it had also been incredibly fun and exciting. She was definitely built for the limelight.

Walking towards the arrivals lounge after retrieving her luggage, though, her smile started to fade as she remembered there would be no one to greet her at the airport and take her home. She'd fooled herself into thinking she didn't want to impose on anyone or make a fuss, but once she actually found herself alone in the midst of hundreds of people at almost eleven in the evening, she felt a profound sadness in realizing she hadn't told anyone she was coming back because there really wasn't anyone to tell.

Susie? After their falling out? Having accepted Shy's offer for a 6-month tour abroad in literally two minutes without any warning? She was sure she could mend that bridge eventually, but calling in the middle of the night after all this time to ask for a lift from the airport was definitely not a good way to start.

Benjamin? Oh, she knew that ship had long sailed. Sure, he always seemed to be supportive of her career, but she'd left the country for half an year without discussing it with him or even really saying a proper, face-to-face goodbye. If she were being honest, someone who would take a fiancée back after a stunt like that didn't really deserve a lot of respect - not that she cared that much anyway, she realized, especially considering she was the one that pulled that stunt on him. All her excitement about a proposal and eventual wedding before she'd left had more to do with the status and the party - and pleasing her mom to some extent - than the groom himself. She genuinely wished for him to meet someone who really put him first though.

Speaking of Rose, her parents? Not after ditching her fiancé without any warning. She knew it would take a while before her mom would even consider being on speaking terms with her again, and as much as her father would probably want to come to her aid, she didn't want to interfere in their relationship even more than she already had ever since her stand-up career had taken off.

Oh, and _definitely_ not Joel. This wasn't even a question in her mind, ever since the disastrous night they had together right before she left - or rather the morning after. It still made her so mad after six whole months of separation that she didn't even want to think about it. She'd deal with _that_ can of worms when she saw him to get the kids, or maybe she would just ask her father to do it or something. She knew Rose would at least want to see her _grandkids_, if not her daughter.

Of course, there was always...no, there wasn't. _Stop it, Midge_. There never was. They weren't ever proper friends, for fuck's sake. In the very few times they'd met - and focus on the _very few_ \- he'd been nothing but a gentleman, a supporter and, really, a propeller of her career. And all of their conversations made her feel warm and appreciated and like they'd known each other all their lives and..._no. Stop it, Midge, stop this nonsense right now! I mean, do you even know his number so you can call him? That doesn't make for a very close friendship, does it? _So there.

Sigh. She would have to face this homecoming on her own after all. Eventually. At that moment, all she wanted was to slip into the backseat of a cab to get to the _one_ place she knew she'd really feel at home right then.

_"Where to, Miss?"_

_"The Gaslight in the Village, do you know it?"_

_"Sure thing, doll."_

It was all she could do to hide her contempt as her eyes reflected in the rear view mirror.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_"Well, hello, Mrs. Big Shot! I didn't think you'd be back to our humble little club after all that worldwide glory!"_

_"Oh, you know, I just came to check out the younglings trying to follow in my footsteps...and give autographs, of course,"_ said Midge to The Gaslight's manager with a sly smile.

_"So no set tonight? It's a little slow here, you'd be really helping me out, kid."_

_"I don't think so, I'm sorry. I came directly from the airport, I'm a little beat."_

_"Here to see your boyfriend then, huh? Good, he's been kinda going through the motions for a while now...when he does bother to perform, that is."_

_"My boyfriend?" _She managed to feign confusion when really she was worried about what he really meant by that. "_I don't have a boyfriend!"_

At that exact moment, she felt someone coming up behind her, smelling of alcohol and cigarettes. Ever since she could remember she'd never found it exactly pleasant, but somehow started to not really mind that kind of atmosphere in the past, say, twelve months or so.

_"Wait, what? _ _We broke up and I didn't even know it? That's savage, Mrs. Maisel!"_

She turned her stool to see her biggest cheerleader yet not-real-friend looking at her with that dashing (and dared she say tender?) grin of his. She couldn't help but brighten up.

_"Lenny."_

_"Midge."_

After about five seconds of just smiling at each other without saying a word, they turned back to an empty stool where the manager had been.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_"So,"_ She poured some whiskey in both their tumblers when they got to the bar. _Their_ bar. "_What's that I hear about going through the motions? I distinctly remember helping you get your swing back not too long ago!"_

_"I thought we were here to talk about your rousing success with Mr. Shy Baldwin. C'mon, tell me everything!"_

_"Don't change the subject, Lenny. What's going on?"_

He groaned. "_It's nothing, really. I've been doing my thing like always, performing here and there, hitting some bars, you know the drill."_

Yeah. She did. She also knew this was something else. "_I see...well, I'd love to hear what you've come up with while I was away!"_

At that point, he got visibly uncomfortable. "_There's pretty much nothing you don't know, I guess."_

_"Are you serious? No new material all this time? The great Lenny Bruce?"_

_"Not so great after all, huh?" _He chuckled. "_Yeah, just basically trying to say the same things in a slightly different way. Sometimes."_

_"I don't understand."_ He could feel her worry in both her speech and expression. "_I expected you to be, you know, *you* again!"_

Oh, now the melancholy set in. "_It *is* me, Midge. It's always been me. A little slow in the creative department, but outside of that..."_

_"That's not true. That's not how I see you."_

_"Then I guess the real issue is you, isn't it?"_

They let the ambiguity of his statement linger while they took their drinks.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

They did get to talk about the tour eventually, and were actually laughing and having fun when one of the waiters, someone she didn't know from before, warned them it was near closing time.

_"Closing time? What time is it?"_

_"Almost three, ma'am. I hate to break up your conversation, but you do have to go. I'm sorry."_

Finally aware of the time, Midge's tiredness immediately sunk in, and she let out a noticeable yawn. She was also a bit buzzed, but was still able to notice Lenny get up, pick up the tab and help her up, seemingly not drunk at all - or, well, much less than he used to be, at least. She felt proud of him, and maybe of herself a little bit too.

_"Let's go, sleepy head. I'll get in the cab with you and take you home, I don't trust you to be alone in this state."_

_"Ooh, look who's talking."_ They both smirked. "_Alright, Mr. Gentleman, but we're gonna have to change the destination."_

_"Too drunk to get home to your parents, huh? Where to then, that manager of yours?"_

_"Nope. Know of any acceptable hotels around here?"_

_"Not even your fiancé's..."_

_"I doubt he even remembers me at that point."_

_"...or Joel's?"_

_"Oh God, no. No no no, sir."_ He felt relieved, which both surprised and scared him.

_"Good lord, woman, what did you do?"_

_"Basically run away to Europe without warning for the past six months? So yeah. No friends at the moment. Guess I have problems of my own."_

_"You know what? You do have one friend. C'mon. You're coming home with me."_

_"There's really no need to bother you, Lenny, I'll be fine in a hotel."_

_"It's no bother. How many times were you there for me, huh?"_

_"Okay, you win. But don't you get any ideas, mister!"_

_"Me? How could I do that? Didn't you hear I haven't had an idea in months?"_

She smiled, and before she knew it, they were in a cab heading south.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lenny's apartment was a one-bedroom in Brooklyn, which was not exactly somewhere she was familiar with or a place she thought people should live in, but there she was. With him. She was still tired, but the long cab ride had softened the effects of the alcohol in her brain enough for her to know that this was _huge_, even though she couldn't explain why. Clearly Lenny also felt that, because she could notice the hesitation in his voice and body language while he showed her around, leaving his bedroom for last. He put her luggage on the floor and was closing the door behind him while she was still inside.

_"What do you think you're doing?"_

He got even more nervous. "_Uh, leaving you to sleep comfortably?"_

_"Oh, you are not giving me your bed, mister! I wasn't even supposed to be here! I can perfectly take the couch, thank you very much!"_

Oh. "_This is *my* bed, you're right, and I *choose* to give it to you."_

_"No! I simply will *not* accept you sleeping on the couch while I take the bed!"_

There it was. The perkiness, the need for independence, the stubbornness he loved so much. Just like that, the nervousness was gone.

_"Okay, well, if you want me to sleep on the bed so much we'll have to share it."_ He pretended to turn away towards the living room, and immediately turned back. "_Not that I would turn it down, you know."_

_"Hey! I told you not to get any ideas!"_

_"What can I say? You inspire me."_

With that, she smiled again and shut the door. Too tired to process his second ambiguous statement of the night, she quickly changed into a nightgown from one of her suitcases, laid down on the bed and in no time was sleeping like a baby, holding the pillow tightly.

Lenny, on the other hand, took a rather long while to fall asleep. He kept staring at his bedroom's door, which was visible from the couch, and for some time debated over drinking some more and taking a bit of the cocaine he had lying around. In the end, he got his booze and the bags, hid them in the back of the kitchen cabinet, then forced himself to sleep.


End file.
